Posted on 10 February 2015
So I posted a video recently trying to dissuade unwanted guests from breaking into my home, which is a perfectly reasonable request, but unfortunately I have been unsuccessful.
Students, this ... ... is Greg Jordan.
And Greg either didn't see the video or chose to ignore it.
So I'm going to do the impolite thing as a hostess and accuse my friend Greg here of being the one who's been breaking into my place and scribbling on my walls.
That was you, wasn't it?
You look like you want to say something.
Do you want to say something?
Well, I'm not really into enhanced interrogation the way that you are, so maybe you could just answer some questions for me. Will you do that?
- That's quite a right foot you have there. Taekwondo? I'm a Jiu Jitsu man myself.
- No one gives a shit.
- You're wrong, by the way, about me breaking in here and painting the walls.
What do you want?
- You turn the camera off, and I'll tell you everything you wanna know. You have no idea what's going on, do you?
- What is this, about lizard people? Or "Endgame?" The end of the world?
- You help me, and I can help you.
- Wow. You are actually crazy.
- Endgame is real!
- And so is your insanity, apparently.
- Turn off the goddamn camera.
- You don't just get to break in here and tell me what to do.
- Turn it off! Turn it off, and I will tell you everything. The only thing you're ever gonna need to know.
- About Endgame? No. Here's what you're gonna tell me, Greg. Why are you here? Why did you break into my place? Why have you been sending me --
- TURN OFF THE CAMERA YOU STUPID LITTLE --
- I'm sorry you had to see that.