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Really Aggressive Human

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Posted on 14 April 2015

Really Aggressive Human04:19

Really Aggressive Human


- (blows out air) Oh my God.

- Did you know that she was going to do that?

- I had no idea that she would ever do anything like that.

- Do you know something about the stone?

- Sure I encouraged her to, like, to reach out but to actually come here...

- She's not coming here, Robin.

- OK, you don't understand how big this is for her. This is such a big step for her, I mean, you just don't get it, you don't get it, but that's Ok, oh my God, I need to relax! It's just that since the breakdown six years ago...

- Oh my gosh, Robin! I have done the craziest thing to try to get her to leave that place and now she's actually doing it.

- What do you know about the stone?

- What? What?

- What do you know about the stone?

- I don't know anything about the stone. She's never talked about it to me. I'm not lying, it's just that sometimes, when I'm in high emotional situations I get tension in my voice and then it makes my voice sound higher, which (sighs) it gives the illusion of inauthenticity, but I'm not lying.

- I don't believe you.

- OK.

- You're not telling me something. What is it?

- You're, like, really paranoid right now.

- I'm not paranoid! You just have this wonderful gift of avoiding complexity.

- Nothing about this is complex!

- You don't know anything about this!

- Sometimes things are just simple, OK? It's not all, like, conspiracy, then Russian frigging nesting dolls, all the time!

- You don't know what you're talking about, Robin!

- Yeah, I do! It's things within things within things!

- I don't mean literally!

- Yes! You know what? Stop taking yourself out on me all the time! How about that?

- How about I was fine before you got here?

- OK, are you asking me to leave?

- No, I'm not. I'm telling you to grow up and stop avoiding the truth like some guilt-ridden child.

- I'm not avoiding anything. Do you want a straight-forward answer?

- Yes, please!

- I would like for you to meet her, OK? I think it would be great, because anytime I try to confront her, or take the reigns with her, it's like the whole thing blows up. And would I like for you to just take control of this situation? Yes, OK? Anything to help her to just, like, move on, or move at all. That is what I want!

- Why couldn't you have just said that from the beginning? Because clearly that's what you wanted this entire time.

- What?

- You didn't care about the turtle, or Piodor, or any of this shit! That was all bullshit!

- It wasn't bullshit.

- Yes, it was! You're a con-artist!

- I am not! You're just this grudge-holding hard-headed...

- What, say it!

- I don't know, you're acting like a really aggressive person today. (laughs) I don't know what to tell you.

- What are you, my horoscope?

- (laughs) I just, I'm not a con-artist! Yeah, sure I thought one day it would be really good for you two to meet, for both of you! Not just for her! And I'm not scheming you, or anything! I just, I like to fix things. I'm kind of a fixer.

- All right, just shh. - I don't know... (sigh) I just... (laughs)

- Fine.

- Fine what?

- Don't... Fine, set it up. - Fine? OK!

- But...

- What?

- I promise nothing, OK?

- OK.

- There's going to be some moment where we all hold hands and it's great. I reserve the right to be an aggressive human.

- That's totally fine! That'll work. That'll work great.

- Great! Well, I'm glad this works for you.

- OK! (laughs) Oh, sidebar: what were you talking about the stone?

- Don't worry about it. Nori has it. I don't even have it here. She's a bit of a control freak, among many other things. So, I'll figure that out, you just go call your mom.

- OK.

- But take it outside because I have a lot of burpees to do.

- All right, because that's totally something I've heard other people say before. That's a really normal thing, what you just said.

- You've... (sighs).

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