Posted on 10th of June 2015
Talking about dreams, writing about dreams -- dangerous territory. 99 times out of 100 you're going to bore someone to tears. Risking that, I still thought this was worth sharing. It's been days and I can't shake it. Almost a week. Alright. Here it is:
A young girl. Japanese. 13 maybe? 12? I don't know. She's in -- some sort of forest. Almost feels like an enclosure really, like a state park. Beautiful. She has... weapons. Things I'd never seen before. She doesn't see me watching her. I call out. Nothing.
Another girl comes out of nowhere, wild smile on her face. She's a little older. She sneaks up on the young one without the young one knowing she's there. She pulls a knife. The young one turns -- the older one puts the knife away. The older one talks to the younger one but the younger girl says nothing back. I start to think the young one may be mute. It doesn't matter. The dream gets incoherent after that. Time jumped, too --- Because suddenly it's night. They've set up camp. We've set up camp. She is me and I am her. I've become the older girl. I get a call from my father. He tells me I have to kill the younger one. I can't do it. Can't take someone's life. I thought I could but I can't. I see the young one next to me, about to attack, blade in hand. But I surrender. Sink to me knees. And offer up my neck. I don't want this, I say. Whatever he wants me to be, I can't be. I pull the young one's hand toward my neck and the blade with it. I tell her it's okay. She knows she has to do it. It's what she's been trained to do. What we've all been trained to do.
The young one slits my throat. I can feel the warm blood running down the front of my body but no pain. And then I'm up. Heart pounding out of my chest. Wondering -- what the fuck was that?